ATTENTION, CITIZENS OF WORLDDGUESSR.
Following the recent and deeply unfortunate departures of several valued members, the Supreme Government has decided to take decisive action to prevent further losses to our glorious online community.
Effective immediately, the Ministry of Eternal Forum Presence will begin its Voluntary Mandatory Cloning Programme.
Members deemed sufficiently important to the continued prosperity of this forum will be contacted and summoned for an official cloning procedure. Participation is, of course, entirely voluntary, provided you understand that refusal would constitute an act of suspicious disloyalty.
Each approved citizen will receive one or more genetically identical replacements, carefully trained to reproduce their posting habits, opinions, arguments, and questionable sense of humour. In the event that the original member goes “missing”, becomes inactive, or develops an unfortunate desire to have a life outside this forum, the clone will seamlessly take their place.
Please note that all clones will be required to maintain a cheerful disposition and periodically post messages confirming that everything is perfectly fine.
Should you notice a fellow member behaving slightly differently, please do not raise unnecessary questions. This is simply the glorious progress of science.
Remain calm. Remain loyal. Keep your happy thoughts.
The Supreme Leader is watching. The Supreme Leader is pleased. The Supreme Leader has already been cloned 47 times.
(It is forbidden to AI check this)
